Journalist and blogger Heather Mundt and I discuss: A Back-to-School Rule for Kids: Trust Your Gut, 5 Guidelines to Help Kids Self-Protect
Category: Parenting
A novel peek into the “convoluted world” of grooming
A very good friend of mine pointed me to a recent review of Eimear McBride’ novel A GIRL IS A HALF-FORMED THING. The author of the review, Paige Reynolds, includes this very intuitive and honest description of some of the reasons why the sexual abuse of teens can be so damaging: The novel thus showcases the…Continue reading A novel peek into the “convoluted world” of grooming
We need to end our love-affair with shame
Slut-shaming, fat-shaming, victim-shaming, political shaming … we are a society in love with shame. And our children pay the price. Note: Guilt is the nasty and usually appropriate feeling people have when they have DONE something bad. Shame is the nasty and usually inappropriate feeling people have when they believe that they ARE bad. In cases of slut-,…Continue reading We need to end our love-affair with shame
Internet Safety for Parents – Costa Mesa Speakers Series
Upcoming speakers will include experts on Bullying Prevention, Child Sex Abuse Awareness and Prevention (read: me), and Substance Abuse The event is free and open to the public. Hope to see you there.
A back-to-school “Must Have” that can save your child from abuse
It’s that time of year again. You’ve made the rounds to the local big box and office supply stores. You have scoured every children’s clothing section in a 20-mile radius for “fashion-forward”—yet “tastefully modest”—school wear. You have soccer snacks, cleats, football gear, cheer uniforms and a brand new lunch box. But there is one more…Continue reading A back-to-school “Must Have” that can save your child from abuse
Rotherdam: Cowardice must never be an option
Child protection officials in Rotherham, England are facing worldwide scorn for saying that they did not report the sexual abuse of 1400 children because they feared being branded “racists.” The child victims were horrifically molested and trafficked by men of Pakistani descent over a 16-year period. At the time, government officials knew about approximately a…Continue reading Rotherdam: Cowardice must never be an option
Two parenting must reads
1) Call the cops, not your college president. There has been a ton of press about the problem of sexual assaults on campus. Recent government intervention—telling universities that they must have better “policies” and “procedures” to handle the crime—is ALL wrong. Why? Check out this article from (the most unlikely of places) the Harvard Gazette.…Continue reading Two parenting must reads
Katie Reed at Andrea Hurst agrees to represent THE WELL-ARMORED CHILD
I teased last week that I had secured an agent for THE WELL-ARMORED CHILD. Now that the paperwork is signed and the deal is sealed, I am very excited to disclose the big news that Katie Reed at Andrea Hurst and Associates Literary Management (knows a good thing when she sees it and) is representing my parents’ guide…Continue reading Katie Reed at Andrea Hurst agrees to represent THE WELL-ARMORED CHILD
THE WELL-ARMORED CHILD got an agent
I am very excited to announce that I have found a literary agent for THE WELL-ARMORED CHILD. Since I haven’t “signed on the dotted line” yet, I’ll keep the name under wraps. Besides, everyone loves a little suspense. It builds character. And yeah … I’m excited.
What is “grooming” and how do child predators target children?
Grooming is a predator’s “ticket” to your child. It is the careful means by which a predator befriends, flatters, builds trust, removes inhibitions, and blurs sexual and body boundaries in order to make a child an “easy” target for abuse—a child who does not fight back and is far less likely to report. Grooming is…Continue reading What is “grooming” and how do child predators target children?
A bishop’s “epic fail” is a lesson to all of us: How to report abuse
St. Louis Archbishop Robert Carlson has a lesson for all of us, and I don’t think it’s the lesson he intended. The situation: When asked by victims’ attorney Jeff Anderson in a recent deposition if he knew in the 1984 that child sex abuse was a crime, Carlson responded, “I’m not sure if I did or…Continue reading A bishop’s “epic fail” is a lesson to all of us: How to report abuse
When a child is abused … by another child
I have written on this subject before. But today’s story out of Sacramento is more tragic and upsetting. The mother of an eight-year-old sodomy victim has filed a lawsuit against the mobile home park where the crime happened in 2013. She charges that the management of Sacramento’s Park Royal Estates Mobile Home Park knew that a 15-year-old boy…Continue reading When a child is abused … by another child
No secrets: It’s easy for kids to keep promises … for the wrong people
One of the most important things I teach parents about empowering children against abuse is: “no secrets.” Yesterday I was reminded about how important it is to REINFORCE this lesson as children get older. Although the following story does not involve abuse, it shows how easy it is for a child to keep a secret with a “trusted…Continue reading No secrets: It’s easy for kids to keep promises … for the wrong people
Need more proof that colleges can’t investigate sex abuse?
A little backwater college in Michigan will give you all the proof you need. You would think that in the middle of a national scandal surrounding sexual assaults on campus that colleges would take the time to remove faculty members who are convicted or admitted child sex offenders. But not Michigan’s Adrian College. Little do the parents…Continue reading Need more proof that colleges can’t investigate sex abuse?
Think that parents don’t want a “toolkit” book to prevent abuse? Think again
Last month, I received a very lovely rejection letter from a well-respected New York agent who had asked to review the entire proposal for THE WELL-ARMORED CHILD. She liked the book, loved the writing, but told me that she just didn’t think the market for the book was “robust” enough. A story yesterday on CNN.com…Continue reading Think that parents don’t want a “toolkit” book to prevent abuse? Think again
We can’t waste this teachable moment: How the teaching of one commandment silenced generations of sex abuse victims and what we can do to change it
Part One: Young Children and the Sixth Commandment It’s the juicy one: Thou shall not commit adultery. How do you teach the term adultery to young children? There are two ways: There is a guilt and sin-laden method that shames child victims of abuse into a lifetime of silence and self-loathing. It also silences witnesses and whistleblowers…Continue reading We can’t waste this teachable moment: How the teaching of one commandment silenced generations of sex abuse victims and what we can do to change it
My kid has been invited to a slumber party! What do I do?
The words from panicky parents ring far and wide: “I went to slumber parties all of the time and, you know, nothing bad ever happened. But things are so different now!” “I’ve never let my child spend a night away from me. But she’s nine now, and all of her friends have slumber parties. I…Continue reading My kid has been invited to a slumber party! What do I do?
When children abuse: A preventable tragedy
A breaking story today has kept my phone ringing off the hook: A southern California third grader has been accused of sexually assaulting a classmate numerous times during the past year. School administrators only found out about it when other students at an after-school program reported what they saw. (Kudos to those kids!) Tragic? Yes.…Continue reading When children abuse: A preventable tragedy
Notorious former OC priest Michael Harris headed to court on more abuse charges
A sex abuse and cover-up lawsuit against former priest Msgr. Michael Harris, Mater Dei High School and the Diocese of Orange is slated to go to trial in Orange County Superior Court on June 18. Harris, the former principal of Mater Dei and Santa Margarita High Schools, has been smack in the center of the clergy sex…Continue reading Notorious former OC priest Michael Harris headed to court on more abuse charges
A Recipe for Child Protection: Add One Part Hero
No one—I repeat: NO ONE— wants to get in front of television cameras and say that they were sexually abused. But when someone does, and does it in an eloquent, emotional and powerful way, that person changes the world. Case in point: Jessica Bohman Jessica Prater Bohman, age 6 five According to Bohman, her family members,…Continue reading A Recipe for Child Protection: Add One Part Hero