The Worthy Adversary

Category: boy scouts

  • A Day of Reckoning for the Boy Scouts

    A Day of Reckoning for the Boy Scouts

    If you think 2020 isn’t going well for you, take a look at the Boy Scouts: it’s estimated that up to 50,000 victims of child sexual abuse could come forward in the Chapter 11 Boy Scout bankruptcy.

    Survivors until November 15 to file paperwork and join the bankruptcy, which I predict will uncover decades of the facilitation and cover-up of the sexual abuse of boys.

    The November 15 deadline is called a “bar date,” and it’s a line in the sand drawn by the bankruptcy courts. The Scouts filed for Chapter 11 protections back in February, due to declining sign-ups and a flood of child sex abuse cases.

    Anyone who comes forward after November 15 cannot join the bankruptcy proceedings. It’s arbitrary and it’s awful, but it’s the way it is.

    “But the Scouts do so much good work, Joelle”

    I know I am going to get a lot of pushback from parents who will say, “But there was no abuse in OUR troop. Why are you painting all of the Scouts with your black brush?”

    Here is my response: Let’s say that the numbers show us that one-in-twenty boys in the Scouts was sexually abused. (Remember, less than one-in-twenty survivors of abuse will even come forward in the bankruptcy).

    Are you willing to let your son be “the one” and throw the Scouts a bone?

    I didn’t think so.

    All of the “good works” don’t make up for a single one of the tens of thousands of boys who were sent to the lions.

    (And here’s a *spoiler alert*: If you took your “very safe” troop anywhere where they encountered other troops and adults, they were at risk.)

    I know someone who was abused in the Boy Scouts. How do I help them?

    Normally, my advice is to “meet survivors where they are.” That is, be a source of support, a listening ear, and a non-judgmental positive force.

    For general information on how to help a survivor who is coming forward, you can read my free e-book, “The Compassionate Response.”

    Unfortunately, this situation is different.

    1. If you know a survivor who is coming to terms with their abuse, you need to let them know that this November 15 deadline is looming. It will not be extended. After the 15th, survivors will (most likely) not be able to expose their abuse in the courts or get compensation for counseling, etc.
    2. Let the survivor know that the deadline is a paperwork deadline. In a bankruptcy proceeding, they will not have to give a deposition or testify in court by November 15 (and, most likely, they won’t at all). They will not have to face the person who abused them.
    3. Tell the survivor that they have options and should talk to a lawyer ASAP. Survivors can file their own “notice of claim,” but I do not recommend that. It’s complicated and the process is not survivor friendly or trauma-informed. There are lawyers who specialize in child sexual abuse cases who can help them: good lawyers charge a standard percentage (usually 33%) of the survivor’s final award. The survivor will pay nothing out of pocket. You can watch this video on how to choose a good civil attorney. The Boy Scouts have hired teams of lawyers to make sure that few survivors as possible are able to exercise their rights. A survivor should not go into the shark tank without someone fighting for them.
    4. Show the survivor that they can reach out to me for help. They can contact me though the blog here or my website. No one should have to embark on this journey alone.

  • Boy Scouts and Abuse: Why come forward?

    Boy Scouts and Abuse: Why come forward?

    Being an honorable Boy Scout is not about forcing yourself to carry secrets of hurt and shame.

    Honoring the Boy Scouts is not about protecting the public from the truth about your experience in Scouting.

    So what do you do if you are a Scout who was sexually abused? What do you do if you ALSO loved Scouting? Maybe your own son is a Scout. Maybe you are an Eagle Scout. Maybe you even helped your son earn that honor because you loved the Boy Scouts that much.

    Maybe Scouting helped you through the hardest time of your life … even though that hardship was caused by a child predator inside of the Boy Scouts.

    As a survivor of child sexual abuse in the Catholic Church—and in a school with a “cult like” following—I understand those torn loyalties: Some of my best memories are from high school. Some of my worst nightmares came from the same place. The choir (facilitated the choir director) was the place where I found my home. And it was the place where my life was destroyed … by the choir director.

    How does an abuse survivor reconcile that? I learned that for me, I needed to reconcile the conflict with honor and with truth. I need to honor myself. I could not honor myself if I remained quiet.

    I needed to make sure that what happened to me did not happen to another girl. It didn’t mean that I was on a mission to destroy the school (which I still *want* to do a lot of the time, but I am working on that), and it doesn’t mean that I am on a mission to tear apart the Catholic Church. It means that I want to rid both institutions of the people who hurt kids.

    It means that it’s time for openness, truth, and accountability. It means that our communities require responsibility. It means that it is safe RIGHT NOW for any survivor who is ready to come forward. It means that we are working towards a day where every survivor feels safe to come forward.

    So back to the Boy Scouts.

    My biggest, most important job is that of mom. My son is entering the eighth grade in a couple of weeks. There is a Boy Scout troop at his school and there was some pretty serious pressure in the early years to get my son to join the Cub Scout troop. My answer was a hard no.

    I was truthful about my reasons, and this was before the scandal was well known. I was nice and super diplomatic, but I was honest.

    Moms did not meet me with enthusiasm.

    The reactions of seemingly sane mothers always surprise me: “Joelle, that was a long time ago.” “Joelle, that would never happen in our troop.” “Joelle, why would you hurt the Boy Scouts like that?”

    Here is what I have to say:

    Without brave survivors coming forward in the civil courts, we wouldn’t know any of this. The perversion files would still be secret. Victims would still be living in silence and shame. It would still be business as usual.

    Coming forward is one of the bravest things that a Boy Scout can do. There is no greater duty to yourself, Scouting, and every boy who strives for the honor of Eagle Scout.

    Coming forward is true leadership in the face of adversity. It is telling the truth and keeping your promises.

    There is no conflict.

    I believe you and I believe in you.

    If you want more information on next steps, you can contact me, download my resource guide here, or go to the National Crime Victims Bar Association on how to find an attorney and learn the rights in the state where you were sexually abused.

     

     

    The Boy Scout Law

    A Scout is:

    TRUSTWORTHY. Tell the truth and keep promises. People can depend on you.

    LOYAL. Show that you care about your family, friends, Scout leaders, school, and country.

    HELPFUL. Volunteer to help others without expecting a reward.

    FRIENDLY. Be a friend to everyone, even people who are very different from you.

    COURTEOUS. Be polite to everyone and always use good manners.

    KIND. Treat others as you want to be treated . Never harm or kill any living thing without good reason.

    OBEDIENT. Follow the rules of your family, school, and pack. Obey the laws of your community and country.

    CHEERFUL. Look for the bright side of life. Cheerfully do tasks that come your way. Try to help others be happy.

    THRIFTY. Work to pay your own way. Try not to be wasteful. Use time, food, supplies, and natural resources wisely.

    BRAVE. Face difficult situations even when you feel afraid. Do what you think is right despite what others might be doing or saying.

    CLEAN. Keep your body and mind fit . Help keep your home and community clean.

    REVERENT. Be reverent toward God. Be faithful in your religious duties. Respect the beliefs of others.

     

  • ICYMI – USA Swimming has a scandal on its hands

    ICYMI – USA Swimming has a scandal on its hands

    Last week, The Orange County Register published an excellent two-part series on the sex abuse cover-up scandal inside of USA Swimming.

    Some of horrific facts reporter Scott M. Reid unearthed:

    • Top USA Swimming executives, board members, top officials and coaches acknowledge in the documents that they were aware of sexually predatory coaches for years, in some cases even decades, but did not take action against them. In at least 11 cases either Wielgus or other top USA Swimming officials declined to pursue sexual abuse cases against high profile coaches even when presented with direct complaints, documents show. With some of the complaints, the decision not to pursue the case was made by Susan Woessner, USA Swimming’s current director of Safe Sport.

    For example, three U.S. Olympic team head coaches, and a USA Swimming vice president were told in the 1980s that a world-renowned coach has sexually abused a female swimmer beginning when she was 12. Wielgus was informed of allegations against the coach at least three times in recent years. But not only did USA Swimming not pursue a case against the coach, it allowed him to continue to have access to USA Swimming facilities, U.S. Olympic and national team events, and the Olympic Training Center. USA Swimming even awarded the club owned and operated by him more than $40,000 in grants. The coach was only banned after pleading guilty to sexual assault, more than a quarter-century after the abuse was first brought to the attention of the Olympic coaches.

    • In the more than 20 years since Wielgus took charge of USA Swimming in July 1997, at least 252 swim coaches and officials have been arrested, charged by prosecutors, or disciplined by USAS for sexual abuse or misconduct against individuals under 18. Those coaches and officials have a total of at least 590 alleged victims, some of them abused while attending pre-school swim classes.

    • USA Swimming board members and coaches acknowledged they were aware of statutory rape cases that occurred during U.S. national team trips to major international competitions.

    • USA Swimming since at least 2010 has kept a list of more than 30 coaches and officials “flagged” by USA Swimming officials after being arrested or accused by law enforcement of sex crimes including rape and child pornography, but not disciplined by USA Swimming. Some coaches and officials on the “flagged” list have not been banned even after they have been convicted of felonies. Of the 32 people on the “flagged list” in 2010, only six have been subsequently banned by USA Swimming. The “flagged list” is not available to the public. Even when USA Swimming has banned coaches and officials for life for sexual misconduct it can be years before their names are listed on the permanently banned list on USA Swimming’s website.

    • Local swim clubs that are members of USA Swimming are insured by U.S. Sports Insurance Company Inc, a company with $31.3-million in assets originally based in Barbados created and solely owned by USA Swimming and governed by former and current USA Swimming officials. While USSIC provides USA Swimming $2-million worth of liability insurance for sexual abuse civil cases, until recently the company provided local clubs only $100,000 worth of coverage for similar cases. This policy of reducing the financial exposure of USSIC at the local level was a factor in generating millions of dollars in “safety rebates” from USSIC back to USA Swimming. In some years the governing body has received back as much as $750,000 in “safety rebates.”

    • USA Swimming has also paid $77,627 to lobbying firms to lobby against legislation in California that would have made it easier for sexual abuse victims to sue their abusers and the organizations they worked for or represented in civil cases.

    The legislation was SB 131.

    You will want to read the whole thing.

    These poor swimmers were sacrificed with nothing to protect them.

    A note: 

    Yes, I am sure that there will be some kind of congressional action about this, although there have been much larger scandals in religious institutions and groups such as the Boy Scouts. But take a deep breath and remember: no one baptizes their child, marries their spouse, buries their dead, confesses their sins, goes through their rights of passage into manhood, and/or climbs the ladder to God through USA Swimming. A swimming org is an easy target.

    Therefore, the fight must continue.

     

  • California outlaws secret abuse settlements, hidden evidence

    California outlaws secret abuse settlements, hidden evidence

    The era of secret child sex abuse settlements in California is over.

    I am usually quick to beat up on California Governor Jerry Brown for his poor record on protecting institutions who cover-up child sex abuse. But a new law enacted January 1, 2017, slipped under my radar— and organizations who harbor men and women who prey on children should be on notice.

    Assembly Bill 1682, introduced by Mark Stone and approved by Jerry Brown on September 30, 2016, says:

    SECTION 1.

    Section 1002 of the Code of Civil Procedure is amended to read:

     (a) Notwithstanding any other law, a provision within a settlement agreement that prevents the disclosure of factual information related to the action is prohibited in any civil action the factual foundation for which establishes a cause of action for civil damages for any of the following:
    (1) An act that may be prosecuted as a felony sex offense.
    (2) An act of childhood sexual abuse, as defined in Section 340.1.
    (3) An act of sexual exploitation of a minor, as defined in Section 11165.1 of the Penal Code, or conduct prohibited with respect to a minor pursuant to Section 311.1, 311.5, or 311.6 of the Penal Code.
    (4) An act of sexual assault, as defined in paragraphs (1) to (9), inclusive, of subdivision (e) of Section 15610.63 of the Welfare and Institutions Code, against an elder or dependent adult, as defined in Sections 15610.23 and 15610.7 of the Welfare and Institutions Code.
    (b) Notwithstanding any other law, in a civil action described in paragraphs (1) to (4), inclusive, of subdivision (a), a court shall not enter, by stipulation or otherwise, an order that restricts the disclosure of information in a manner that conflicts with subdivision (a).
    (c) Subdivisions (a) and (b) do not preclude an agreement preventing the disclosure of any medical information or personal identifying information, as defined in subdivision (b) of Section 530.55 of the Penal Code, regarding the victim of the offense listed in subdivision (a) or of any information revealing the nature of the relationship between the victim and the defendant. This subdivision shall not be construed to limit the right of a crime victim to disclose this information.
    (d) Except as authorized by subdivision (c), a provision within a settlement agreement that prevents the disclosure of factual information related to the action described in subdivision (a) that is entered into on or after January 1, 2017, is void as a matter of law and against public policy.

    (e) An attorney’s failure to comply with the requirements of this section by demanding that a provision be included in a settlement agreement that prevents the disclosure of factual information related to the action described in subdivision (a) that is not otherwise authorized by subdivision (c) as a condition of settlement, or advising a client to sign an agreement that includes such a provision, may be grounds for professional discipline and the State Bar of California shall investigate and take appropriate action in any such case brought to its attention.

     

    In other words, if there are damaging documents (with the victims’ and innocent parties’ names redacted) about the guilt/liability of the perpetrator entered into evidence, they must be made public upon settlement.

    If there is damaging or embarrassing evidence about the cover-up – all evidence must be made public upon settlement. No more secret settlement documents.

    This is huge. One example: the six+ year fight that victims in the Archdiocese of Los Angeles had with church lawyers to get secret abuse evidence made public would never have had to happen had this law been in effect in 2007 when their original settlement was reached.

    Who Will Feel the Pain?

    The scope of this new law is far greater than just clergy abuse (hooray!). Who will be affected the most? People like the Michael Jackson estate, who was able to pay large settlements to child victims in return for keeping evidence secret.

    Or the Boy Scouts, who have thousands of pages of perversion files—outlining decades of abuse—that the public has yet to see (and victims they are still fighting in the courts).

    Charles T. Ritz III, La Habra High School Teacher accused of abuse

    Who else? Public schools and teachers’ unions, who have created layers of regulations that protect offending teachers at the risk of vulnerable students—Teachers like alleged offender Charles Ritz who, after being accused of abuse by students in Illinois, was reportedly allowed to resign in the mid 1980s. By 1986, he was teaching in Fullerton, California, where he has now been accused of abuse by more than ten students.

    Why should teachers’ unions be on alert? Well, the California unions have regulations that expunge teachers’ personnel records of allegations of child sexual abuse or other criminal behavior after three years.

    And Ritz? He was the president of the local Fullerton teachers’ union.

    Here’s the kicker, from The Orange County Register:

    Although Ritz resigned from La Habra High in May, he renewed his California teaching credential in July.

    I’m sure he did.

    But as soon as his first victim uses the civil courts to expose him, we are going to learn a whole lot more.

     

  • The Well-Armored Child – FLASH SALE!

     

     

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    Woo Hoo! I’m on sale!

    THE WELL-ARMORED CHILD – the book that is being hailed as the “definitive child safety manual” – is on sale for only 99 cents (YAY!) for the Kindle and Nook.

    You can get the Kindle version here. The Nook version is available by clicking here.

    In the book, you can learn age-specific tools and strategies to keep your children (from birth to adulthood) empowered and safer from predators. You’ll also learn about the importance of changing our statutes of limitation for sex crimes and how and why our institutions (such as the Catholic Church and the Boy Scouts) have failed us when it comes to child protection.

    Don’t have an ebook reader? Don’t worry. Both formats allow you to read the book on your computer and offer apps to read ebooks on your tablet and phone (if you like very tiny books – and aren’t getting old and far-sighted like me).

    So, if you’re in the mood for a great book at a bargain price – and if you’d like to make my life 100% more awesome – just pick up a copy of The Well-Armored Child for Nook or Kindle for 99 cents this week.

    The sale ends Monday, January 18.

     

    Last of all – a sincere THANK YOU for all your support and for taking the time to check out my work. It really means a lot to me.

    As always, just email me back if you have any questions – and keep your fingers crossed 🙂

    Next month: You’ll have access to a FREE copy of one of my most popular ebooks.