The Worthy Adversary

Category: Parenting

  • He didn’t murder any of our students—so it’s ok

    He didn’t murder any of our students—so it’s ok

    Schools need to rethink how they handle cases of teachers who are busted with child pornography and/or who molest.

    Imagine if you received a letter from your child’s school like this:

     

    Dear Parents:

    Today, Mr. John Doe, a long-term substitute teacher and math tutor at our school, was arrested for murder. We learned that he lured his victims from tutoring websites.

    We are fairly certain he did not murder or attempt to murder any of our students. We didn’t ask any of the students. We also didn’t take a headcount to see if anyone was missing. We didn’t ask if anyone has been shown photos of corpses or had engaged in inappropriate conversations with Mr. Doe.

    But the police told us that none of the murders involve our students. So don’t worry.

    Sincerely,

    Your Principal

     

    If you replace the word “murder” with “child pornography” and “sexual abuse,” that’s the gist of the letter that parents at San Pedro’s Mary Star of the Sea High School received from principal Rita Dever the other day when substitute teacher Daniel T. O’Connell was arrested for possession of child pornography and making inappropriate contact with children via a tutoring website.

    Child pornography is not a victimless crime. It’s disgusting. It’s images of children being raped and tortured. It’s so bad, in fact, that two Microsoft employees recently sued the company, saying that being forced to view it (to see if it needed to be flagged, removed and reported) gave them PTSD.

    But don’t worry, Principal Dever says, “At this time, the police have indicated that Mr. O’Connell’s alleged activities do not involve any students at Mary Star of the Sea High School nor did they take place on the Mary Star campus,” her letter stated in part.

    What should she be doing?

    • Extensive outreach and education about what child pornography is (child abuse images and a terrible crime), how to report it, and how to protect children from being exploited,
    • Talking to parents about abuse and how to examine data storage devices in their homes if their child was tutored by O’Connell,
    • Bringing in a speaker from the National Center for Victims of Crime or Homeland Security about internet safety and protecting yourself against internet predators,
    • Being vigilant in her letter to parents, saying that the exploitation of children and teens has no place at her school.

    Just saying, “It didn’t happen here,” doesn’t keep anyone safe. It just breeds a false sense of security and puts everyone at risk.

     

  • A Week of Bad Comparisons and Conclusions

    A Week of Bad Comparisons and Conclusions

    All I wanted to do this week was scream NO! at sportswriters and pundits.

    The Rose Bowl Game and the Pox of Jerry Sandusky

     

    You can’t compare a wide-spread criminal child sex abuse scandal to a free apartment for a running back. You can’t.

    Sports writers and talking heads said that both Penn State’s and USC’s tarnished brands could be summed up by single names: Jerry Sandusky and Reggie Bush. If I were Reggie Bush, I’d be mad as hell to be in that sentence.

    I still believe that Penn State Football should have received the death penalty. Sandusky used the program to attract victims. Paterno and the administration knew what Sandusky was doing. The coaching staff turned a blind eye. The program should have been disbanded. Period.

    At least the Trojans won. My dad (class of 1960) went to bed a happy man. Fight on!

    Bad Politicking about Child Sex Trafficking

    No, child prostitution is NOT legal in California.

    But a new law in California may have some problems. SB 1322, which became law Jan 1, made it impossible for a child to consent to engage in the criminal behavior of prostitution—just like a child can’t consent to sex with an adult.

    Therefore, the minor cannot be criminally charged. This is good. We don’t want children being sent to jail for a crime they cannot consent to committing. We need to help these kids, get them out from under their pimps’ control, and save their lives—not slap them with rap sheets and prison records.

    The law has good intentions, but there are some potential problems. Unfortunately, those problems are pointed out in stories with headlines like “CHILD PROSTITUTION NOW LEGAL.”

    And we all know there is no such thing as child prostitution. It’s child sex trafficking. It’s selling kids for sex.

    The problems with the law (read the whole thing here) are this:

    • While a child who is being sold for sex will be taken into limited custody, there is no specification as to what custody means. Is that jail? Foster care?
    • What is limited custody? With an arrest, child protection and trafficking task force authorities know that they had a certain amount of time to find parents, foster care, family, etc.
    • With an arrest, there was a paper trail (a horrible system, yes, but at least there was a paper trail).
    • The police will now have to deal with the Welfare Code when it comes to helping trafficking victims. (Is the child in immediate danger? If the child isn’t in immediate danger, will the cops have to walk away?)
    • California’s government agencies are grossly inept at dealing with things as they are. In fact, much of our anti-sex trafficking work has been done by law enforcement, faith-based groups, and nonprofits. I hope that this law doesn’t dump these vulnerable kids into a state agency that can barely keep the lights on.

    I hope I am wrong in my trepidation. I am open to all suggestions, ideas, places to go, people to talk to in the comments.

  • OC Family: Stopping Child Predators

    OC Family: Stopping Child Predators

    From the October issue of OC Family, now online:

    Stopping Predators:

    Straight talk, honest, trust: tools for proving childhood sexual abuse

    You can read my whole essay here.

  • Guam Gov signs Civil Window into law

    Guam Gov signs Civil Window into law

    Today, Guam Governor Eddie Calvo “signed a bill that allows victims of child sexual abuse to sue their abusers as well as anyone who helped them and the institutions with which they are affiliated.”

    I am overjoyed for Guam’s victims of sexual abuse and Catholics as a whole. They have fought long and hard for accountability. Now, they are going to be able to use the courts to get it.

    I predict that the local church and Rome are going to throw tons of money into the legal fight against these cases. Fortunately, the recent civil windows in Hawaii, Minnesota, Delaware, and California have provided victims and their attorneys with great knowledge, expertise, and insight.

    We will learn a lot about what people knew on Guam and when they knew it. A lot of accused predators are going to be exposed—many still working in churches. It won’t be pretty, but victims and local Catholics will come out stronger.

     

     

  • Why is Hon so scared?

    Why is Hon so scared?

    There is a huge chance that the history of the Catholic Church on Guam will be rewritten … by Catholics. And it’s pretty awesome.

    All it will take is a small change in the law that will give victims of sexual abuse the opportunity to use the civil courts to expose their abusers and the men and women who covered up the abuse.

    From the Pacific Daily News:

    Gov. Eddie Calvo is weighing the concerns of the Catholic church and the community as he decides what to do with a bill that would allow victims of child sexual abuse to sue their abusers, according to the governor’s office.

    Today is the governor’s last day to sign or veto Bill 326-33, or the bill lapses into law without his signature. Senators on Sept. 12 approved the bill 13-0. If it becomes law, it could make the Catholic church on Guam open to lawsuits by those who, in recent months, have publicly accused priests of raping or molesting them.

    In the past few days, Archbishop Savio Tai Fai Hon, the current apostolic administrator of the Catholic archdiocese, has collected signatures and spoken out against the bill. He says (like many of his brother bishops) that the bill will force them to close churches and end many needed services on the island.

    Nothing could be further from the truth.

    The real fear is that this bill, if made law, will expose DOZENS of sex-abusing clerics on Guam. Worse (for him) still, victims will have the opportunity to find out WHAT church officials knew and WHEN they knew it.

    The law will also most likely expose clerics who molested kids and are STILL WORKING IN CHURCHES. Priests like Archbishop Anthony Apuron, who *ahem* is still the Archbishop. (Note: The Vatican has done NOTHING to help Guam’s victims, properly punish Apuron, or end abuse. NOTHING.)

    Since Apuron has now been accused of sexual abuse numerous times, Hon’s real problem isn’t money. His real problem is the exposure of an archdiocese that knew about abuse and abusers for DECADES.

    Instead of calling the police, archdiocese officials silenced victims, promoted abusers, and conned every single Catholic on the island into believing that their churches were safe.

    Catholics want the bill signed. In fact, Guam’s Catholics have been the driving force behind helping victims, exposing Apuron, and finding justice.

    Hopefully, Calvo agrees.